Since we came to be self aware, we began to think of how and why we are here on this planet. After months of research,frustration and thinking of "how,what,why life is reading up on from quantum physics, evolution, different people's perspective on life and religions perspectives of how and why this "life" is and come to be and obviously looking at it objectively and from many different angles I came to a conclusion finally. This holy reality we perceive now, this perception of consciousness. This moment of being alive we have, is Paradise. This is everything. This chance of being alive is heaven. Why cant we all see it? We are so confused and blinded and always hope for maybe after this "what is now" it will be better. why? We create our own heaven and hell. We always choose who we want to be. Its just all so clear for me now. hahaha I feel ecstasy,nirvana, ultimate self actualization and this holy reality "heaven" I'm perceiving now is just beginning. I cant really say in words of how I feel at his moment. I can maybe describe it by waking up one day and realizing you are in heaven ha ha ha! Prove me wrong!! I dare you. We can determine what everything it is made of quarks inside of atoms inside of matter then realize there isn't really matter its all but empty space. We might know what everything is made of but never know what caused it all to be here and that allows all of our "conscious beings" the freedom to believe in what/how ever we want and gives a level of freedom to our minds I can't compromise. I just think holy fucking shit this moment/life/conciseness/being alive what ever you want to call it is magnificent! After a few billion billion infinite billion years I get a chance of perceiving “THIS”. YEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAW!!! Is all I can say.I know there is terrible things in this world what can happen to any conscious being. It is what will happen if you give mobile organic matter a conscious mind. Just having the opportunity to experience being alive and breathing is a abnormal/extraordinary and gracious gift/experience I think. What ever this is or who/what ever re-action caused millions of atoms to form few trillion interacting neurons and cells to form a conscious entity is fucking remarkable. It doesn't matter what you believe in or how you live as long as you embrace it. What I think wrong is that some dick head thousands of years ago planted the image in people's minds that after this holy reality there is even a better one IF " you live you way in a certain way." Thats fucking bullshit and has made people live this life blindly only waiting for the weekend only waiting for retirement and only waiting to die. How pitiful I'm not saying you should be always happy how fucking boring will that be? Being sad is sometimes a good felling as well. Makes you feel alive. We will be all emotionless beings. And yes you might be dealt a shit hand. I don't want to sound like those stupid preachers but you can always change and be who you want to be. If sitting in a room 10 meters underground trying to figure out alien inscriptions is your thing so be it. Your enjoying this chance of being alive and doing something with it. And no one knows maybe you will be given another change of being alive maybe not on this planet or in that form but ALIVE! The fact is that we are and have always been speculation under the sky.
We /no one knows what happens after death and "life" is merely a short short period of time. Define life? On its basic level? It is a story between a past we can no longer remember and a future we know nothing about. That's it. No one knows how the fuck and what life is. Most if not all people that is alive on this earth at his moment has a "not sure how to explane this" but we all have a barrier of thought, a structure that we can't think past berried deep in our subconscious. And that is that there is a better/happy eternal afterlife a realm in which people who have died continue to exist. Heavan/paradise/zion/. And that all is just a theory that started way back with some believes/religions. And that has become like a normal thing in everyday life. It is so imprinted deep in our subconscious minds that our conscious mind still believes it even if we we don't think about it or "believe" it. I have been a atheist for more than 5 years now and I knew there is probably nothing there after death. But I still had the idea of afterlife/heaven back in my mind that I wasn't conscious of. Its like my subconscious was waiting for something better but not my conscious me. The day I came to this theory/way of thought/meaning of life everything has changed. I see life with totally different eyes now. I see life as it really is. Not living with that barrier of thought I saw/experienced this precious moment/life life like I have never before. And I thought fuck why don't everyone see life this way? Its is fucking orgasmic/phenomenal/unequalled. Is it because everyone has this cloud over there mind that keeps them from experiencing/truly perceiving/enjoying this precious moment? If you come to realize this is actually what everyone has been waiting for/living for. This is actually heaven! This is it!! And everyone around me has been fooled and they have heaven taken way from them just because of one string of thought. That's why I say crucify all you Martyr's that have been and that will come! You have planted the seed in minds and have taken the one thing, the key of life away from everyone. Lets say there is a "heaven/eternal happy afterlife" and some guy "in heaven" tells everyone that you know what? There is a even better life after this. It is amazing and you can't even think of perceiving it. Everyone in heaven will live towards that and forget how great/amazing/magnificent there world is. Off coarse we all know that "heaven/paradise/eternal happy" is just a thing people made up because we are all but speculation under the sky. Don't let anybody tell you otherwise! For our small/insignificant consciousness we have at this moment this is everything! so enjoy it and make the most of it. You can always change do/be anything/anyone. There is so much stuff in this world that can please/interest/satisfy/excite/stimulate anyone and I say anyone. Embrace this magnificent reality but remember one thing. You can't always just live life in the moment. If we all did that we would all party or do whatever makes us happy all the time and end up homeless with nothing but a sad life. You should enjoy/live your life as a whole. I think the key is to decide which route will have the more positive effect on the rest of your life and take it.
Maybe the world is just purely by accident it is a possibility. Its still doesn't prevent us from enjoying it us much as possible. Lets say its all just atoms and energy that interacted with insane amount of speed that caused the universe to develop and here we are. Wouldn't it make this moment we perceive now even more precious/insignificant? Its a chance you get to be alive and make with it whatever you want even if it was by accident. Having a conscious mind that has the ability to expand past physical matter and being in a organic self repairing/maintaining body that is in a world where there is other conscious organic bodies as well which you can feel,understand,hate,love,exchange knowledge,emotion,thoughts,experiences. Holy fucking shit!! I think we are just losing the ability to make something of oneself and feeling good about life everyday. This is yours to create. As I said before we are all speculation under the sky. There is no proof of an eternal happy afterlife. So if our lives are but a moment of persevering one consciousness subjectively from another that takes place between a past we no longer remember and a future we know nothing about. Can't that be heaven? As Sartre said we should never simply write ourselves off and see ourselves as the victim of various forces. It's always our decision who we are. All I'm saying is whatever the fuck this is moment of conscious experience is its yours to manipulate. You create your own heaven and hell no matter what. To many people take/live/perceive life as merely a interlude to something greater and that lessen/dims/trivialize all happiness. It is very difficult to exclude yourself from that thought barrier because that thought dwells in most if not all minds but once you break free/realize that this is everything!! That this is heaven! That this is such such a precious moment no matter what interest/desire/fulfil/satisfy you. We don't remember who or what came before this moment of consciousness nor to what it unfolds all we know is that "THIS".